Reston Mom: a thought on parenting

I've recently had some moments with the girls where I've been astounded by something they've done, like "really, how could you think that was okay?" "Where is your common sense?" kind of things. And, right at that moment I've been so tempted to just blow up and be really, really angry with them (admittedly, a few times this is exactly what I've done). So, I've had to remind myself of something and this is what I wrote in my homeschooling journal:

On Parenting: Remember, you can't hold your children to your expectations if you haven't

instructed/taught them first what you expect. When you feel frustrated think "I need to

parent this child right now, not punish them for something I didn't tell them was unacceptable."

and take a moment right then to teach them what is expected in the future instead of just

blowing your top and yelling at them or being angry. Of course, once you've instructed them, you

must commit yourself to holding them accountable.

Sometimes I just want to shout at them, "Don't you know better?" and occasionally it fits that they should know better, but often I need to remember that this isn't a moment to crush them for not being perfect, but a grand opportunity to guide and teach them. When my kids make me so mad, it is often just a demonstration to me of the areas in which I need to better address and parent my children.

Comments

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Wow, I really needed this reminder today. My 2 1/2 year old is exploring her limits lately and frustrating me to no end. Thank you so much for sharing.

Posted by: LG's Mama | April 30, 2009 at 04:32 PM