Reston Mom

mama exposed - bathroom reading

 My sister recently sent me a book titled "The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society."  I am enjoying it very much, it is certainly recommendable.  But here is the funny thing - and let me say that my insightful and experienced sister sent this book to me with understanding and intention that this was precisely what would happen - I keep it in my downstairs bathroom, which is currently my favorite reading place.  The book is composed as a collection of letters.  Whenever I manage to break away from everything else for a quick pee, I lock the door and read one letter.  Occasionally I do this to the complete neglect of a screaming child, I admit.  I'm really only in there a very short time, but it is like a mini-retreat - a tiny vacation.  It is just a moment away from the hustle and bustle of being mom for a quick journey across the Atlantic into the thoughtful lives of other adults at another time in history.  Ahhh.  You don't know what a grand effect this distraction has on my sanity, this brief walk of my imagination into another world.  

I know for a fact that I am not the only mother who has taken refuge in the bathroom from time to time. Where else is there the same privacy (if you are lucky enough to get it even there with small children around)? And these days my time to sit with a book is limited and I just absolutely can't stand to not finish a chapter (I'm quite neurotic about it actually).  So the layout of this book is perfect for me right now.  The only problem is, I'm going to finish it before too long.  Anyone have any other great recommendations for me of a book like this or with very short chapters?  It is quickly becoming a must have!

the way her mind works is a mystery to me

Mom: why is your doll wearing a rag dress?

Hope: "because she gave all her money away to a children's hospital and the clothes she's wearing got all torn up in a tornado.  Luckily, she wasn't hurt though."

baby, not that you look like an old man, but....

You've got that Robin Williams impersonation down pat

 
 
 

I underestimated her reach

 

One of eighteen survived - the one she grabbed. 

 

our fish lives...again

In the archives of this blog you can find posts which testify to the crazy experiences we've had with our little starter fish tank.  Here's the latest.  We have been down to one fish for a while now - Twitchy, by name.  The tank was turning green and gross again so I needed to clean it and proceeded to do so with care.  I was very gentle with the fish and careful about timing and the water, following the directions of pet-store guy, but nonetheless about 10 minutes after returning Twitchy to his cleaner home, I found him motionless and floating belly up at the top of the water.

I relayed the bad news to the girls who took it pretty well.  They decided that they really wanted to bury the fish in the yard and I gave in.  So we headed upstairs with some tissue paper to wrap the little fish in. But, when I placed Twitchy on the paper he began to..well...twitch.  So, I put the flapping little fish back into the tank (after a little effort to unstick his body from the tissue paper) - where he sank to the bottom. A short while later we decided to check on him again and found him laying completely on his side on the bottom of the tank.  But, as Maddie so kindly pointed out, his mouth was moving ever so slightly.  So, we decided to wait a little longer until he would finally and irreversibly kick the bucket.  

Another short while later I hear Maddie calling from the top of the stairs "He's swimming around mom! Twitchy is swimming around!"  Sure enough, like nothing ever happened.  Wha?????

When I told Matt, he said to me - "don't you remember? don't you remember how Twitchy got his name?" Actually this is the second resurrection of Twitchy.  This all happened the same once before, only that time he came back to us with a slight tilt to his swim and a tiny twitchiness - hence name.  

My guess is that I've got the temperature in the tank still off or something and have now sent this poor creature into total shock twice - from which he has twice revived and survived to swim on among his glow-in-the-dark plastic plants.  

Unfortunately, I have to say I was kind of looking forward to that fishy funeral.  But he's a fighter, that Twitchy!

(by the way, if you are interested, I think Twitchy is some kind of Gourami fish)

and then I shoved my 3 yr. old into the concrete...

Sounds pretty bad, huh.  Here is the story of today's bumbling accident:

On the way home from somewhere else, we needed to stop by the grocery store and Rite Aid - which happen to be located in the same center.  So I put Ami (in her carseat) into our snap n' go and we walked to the pharmacy. Therefore, we still had the stroller at the grocery store - and you should have seen us,\ with Hope pushing the stroller as I pushed the cart and Ami screaming because she was tired and a little hungry and Maddie screaming because she is three and hadn't had her nap yet.  I'm sure everyone in the store felt very sorry for me at the moment - but I was doing fine, until...

We leave the store, park the cart, and go to get the car.  Maddie is holding onto the stroller handle beside me because we are about to cross the street and I push the stroller over the curb not noticing that I chose the exact spot where the drain into the gutter is.  Suddenly one wheel of the stroller is caught in the opening and I feel myself and the stroller going over into the road and taking Maddie with us.  Without even thinking, I react.  And with a massive pump of adrenaline, I push Maddie off of the stroller to stop the momentum, keep her out of the road and to allow me to regain my balance - which luckily I do.  I then get the wheel out of the gutter and get us all back safely on the sidewalk so that I can pick up my screaming 3 yr. old who now has a bloody elbow from hitting the pavement.  And the baby of course is screaming along as I try to reassure Maddie - who is shocked that Mommy just shoved her into the concrete - that I really didn't mean to hurt her, but was trying to protect all of us from breaking our necks and getting run over by cars because actually I love her so very much - so you see, it's because I love you that I gave you a bloody elbow (thankfully not a bloody nose) and...oh well, let's just get the heck out of here! 

My saving grace is that by now I'm experienced enough with the whole mommy thing to know one very key fact: this will all be over soon.  "In twenty minutes," I tell myself, "Maddie will be napping, the baby will eat and sleep, and peace will ensue once again."  Thankfully, it was true.

Just for fun

I know I've mentioned that I love these websites just for the fun of them:

uglyoverload.blogspot.com

cakewrecks.blogspot.com

Well, I'm adding one more - read the claims, and leave one if you have one :)

anonymouspostcard.org

Photo shoot

Our friend Dave had us over to do a baby photo shoot for Ami.  These are a few (okay, a ton - but I couldn't help myself) of the rough shots.  Obviously when they are finished all the black will be evened out so you only see skin and what not, but I just love all the funny expressions we got from Ami.  

Precious. 

Why do these people keep talking to me like that?

seriously?  

I want to sing Opera when I grow up... 

my daddy's so excited, but duh - look at me, I'm gorgeous! 

work that shoulder...this is how those celebs do it, right? 

hey, I know you! 

well and then she says to me... 

Did someone say milk? 

What you talkin' bout Willis? 

now this is the life! 

are we finished yet? 

well kids, I'll check ya lata 

Most unfortunate names revealed

This article gave me a little chuckle today.  

I also read through the comments given to the article...I think my favorite was:

"My name was Susan Frame. I am a lawyer. I met and married Robert who is a banker. His surname is Mee. Now we are Sue Mee, a lawyer, and Rob Mee, a banker - ironic? I have taken no end of stick for this, believe me.
Susan Mee, Doncaster"

But I feel compelled to add that while these were a little funny, they are by no means the most unfortunate names in the world - have I told you about the twin girls born in a bathroom?  Latrina and Toiletta (true story).  Or my sister-in-law's student Le-a?  That's not "Leah" or "Leya" - that's Ledasha, because in the words of her mother "the dash don't be silent."  

you know we say it often enough when...

We were standing in the kitchen the other day when our 3 yr. old Maddie started getting all worked up about something. Matt says, "Maddie you just need to...."
and Maddie cuts him off in her little high-pitched voice: "chill out.  I just need to chill out."
Clearly she's heard us say this before, many times.

I really didn't put her up to it

Maddie, not quite 3,  is my little helper in the kitchen.  Her face lights up when I ask her if she wants to help me make dinner and she always does a great job!  But last night, as we had just finished up some prep work in the kitchen and were waiting for my husband to come home, he called to say he was on his way.  Maddie made it very clear that she wanted to talk to him over the phone, so I passed it off to her.  After some casual conversation this is what I hear:

"and Daddy, sometime could you fix dinner all by yourself?"
......
" yeah, you fix dinner all by yourself."
.....
" because, mommy is too busy.  She's too busy cooking dinner.  So you need to do it by yourself sometime, okay?" 

good to know she's looking out for me.

I love how little minds work

As I mentioned, Hope began reading the Magic Clubhouse series of chapter books, and I think she is really enjoying it.  In the first book, the kids travel back to a prehistoric time and encounter real dinosaurs.  When she finished chapter 3, one of the characters was face to face with a Pteranodon.  
I asked Hope what she thought about the kids going back in time and confronting a dinosaur, she looked at me and said,
" Well, in videos it always ends well, so I think this will probably all end well too." 

Her insight made me chuckle.  At least she is optimistic!

doozy of a day!

We all have 'em - those crazy days that just exemplify the challenges of being a parent. Occasionally my best friend Heather will email me one of her days.  I LOVE this!  It always makes me laugh...because I know her and can totally picture her in these moments.  But also because I can totally picture myself in these moments and there is a certain camaraderie between moms that makes it so good to know you're not the only one with days like this! 

7:00 Wake up and pray

7:20 Get ready for school/fighting with the kids over what to wear

8:15 Running late/pick up McDonald’s

8:45 Arrive at school in nick of time, Megan has spilled a water bottle that has biscuit pieces/lollipop sticky backwash in it all over the floor and I kneel in it, leaving big spots of funk all over my knees

9:00 Drop off the Bible study supplies I promised to bring, though I can’t attend today. Catch up with Andy briefly and Megan slams her head into the wall. A little deeper and we would have had stitches. Either way there’s a nice abrasion and bump. Hold ice on it.

9:15 Go to client’s school to pick up some records. Counselor decides she wants to talk for a few minutes. So with my funky knees, sneakers and 2 year old in hand with the gooseegg on her head, go into a conference room to have a professional discussion.

10:00 Arrive at store parking lot to run errand but realize my end of month timesheet is due at work by 10 this morning. I don’t have time to go to work or home to send it in and make it to the dentist on time. I run into the church office and beg the receptionist to send it off of the memory stick in my purse(luckily I had that). After that crisis averted, I decide to let Megan play on the playground for a few minutes before going to the dentist to get my stitches out. Megan falls and slams her eye on the metal steps right before we need to go and has an absolute SHINER on her eye/cheek. She screams and cries. I try to take her to the car but she’s mad because she wants her last turn on the slide. She’s still in pain so she cries all the way down the slide, but was determined to do it.

10:45 Arrive at the dentist. Stitches removed but it’s not healing as well as it should(I could have told you thatJ). Stay on motrin but change all the appointments you’ve made over the next two months because it’s going to take longer to heal than expected. I stand there trying to concentrate on my family’s insane schedule while Megan is throwing her bouncy ball prize they gave her into everyone who walks by.

11:30-12:30 Run errands. While trying on a pair of pants, Megan rams her mouth into the door and starts screaming. Lollipop #3 is shoved in her mouth as we leave the store.

12:30 Pick up Jonathan from school. He’s been written up today because he deliberately didn’t listen to the teacher, threw himself head first down the slide, hurt his arm and they had to bandage it up. Jonathan and Megan compare boo-boos.

12:45 Grab lunch on the go for the kids before doctor’s office.

1:20 Doctor’s appointment. The children fight and scream over a book and won’t listen. My blood pressure was high(go figure) and they want to monitor it long term. The numbness in my hand is carpal tunnel syndrome which is not fun but very treatable and no crazy tests need to be done so far. We leave but the nurse gives them different colored lollipops. This is a crisis. Megan wants the blue one and then throws her red one on the floor. Both children scream almost all the way home until Megan suddenly conks out and falls asleep in a matter of seconds. I blast worship music over the screams hoping that counts for somethingJ.

2:30 Children are asleep (yeah) and mommy is recovering, getting ready to go to work in a few hours(my easy job-dealing with moms whose children are in foster care).

 

So-the question remains-how much worse would the day have been if I hadn’t gotten up to pray first?!!!

clumsy child-induced situations

So, you're in Target with two kids, one at least constrained within the cart - which happens to be quickly filling with little odds and ends that you've been meaning to pick up, though it has taken a while to actually get pulled together enough to even attempt a target run with the kids. When of course, one of the munchkins suddenly needs to use the bathroom (even though you were just in there with the other kid)....
What to do? What seems like the most uncomplicated answer is to just take it all in with you...that's right, just push the entire cart into the bathroom.  Oh, I've done it.  And, in reality, trying to push an unevenly weighted fat red cart around the awkward corner and through the door, with one hand while holding the door with the other and trying not to run over the confused people to whom you are giving apologetic glances as they are smooshed backwards into the narrow bathroom, is NOT less work than just popping the kids in and out of the cart, and MUCH more clumsy. (though is helpful in curbing the curiosity unconfined kids seem to have especially for those little "trashcans" in the stalls)  Gratefully, when you actually make it inside,  there is a large handicap stall right in the middle (instead of at the end) which, surprisingly will fit the entire cart.  Except that there is very little room to maneuver and people are giving you those "looks" that they reserve especially for moms.  God forbid that it actually be me who has to use the bathroom which is just going to make me that much less patient and graceful...and if another mom tries to come in there with her cart or stroller...well, forgetaboutit. 
I used to think that I had to be the only one desperate or crazy enough to try this, so I was pleasantly surprised when yesterday, after taking my girls into the women's restroom - sans cart - I noticed another woman come out of the center stall with her giant red cart and kid parked in front.  You should have seen my warm inner smile...it's like we were members of our own secret club.  You know what else? As we were leaving, another mom pulled up with her cart and headed in. 
Of course there are better ways to do this...that's not really the point.  The point is that moms do crazy things all the time that we feel so clumsy and silly for...but some days being a mom isn't about being perfectly resourceful or graceful, it's about getting it done.  You might not be part of the "shopping cart in the restroom" club, but maybe it's the overflowing HUGE diaper bag club, or the uncoordinated, clumsy, nursing-in-some-inadequate-corner-in-public club,  or the I-came-unprepared-so-now-my-kid-has-on-half-the-amount-of-clothes-they-should-and-is-eating-whatever
-stale-mushed-snack-I-could-manage-to-dig-out-of-the-bottom-of-my-bag club, or whatever... I'd like to go up to every woman I've ever seen in an awkward child-induced scenario and pat her on the back and say, "hey, I'm in that club too."  In fact, I think I'm the president. 

overstimulation

oh the woe of overstimulation....I'm talking about me here, not the kids.  I'd love to have someone sweep me up in their arms about now, whisk me out of a busy room, rock me for a moment and place me in a comfy bed for some quiet time and a nice nap. Kids don't know how great they've got it.  I could totally melt down right now and because I'm an adult and not a cherubic 2 year old everyone would be shocked, think I was crazy and might need a stint in an asylum but I'd still probably have to make blueberry pancakes for breakfast before everyone was ready to leave the house on the way to my committal. 
Okay....that's a bit of exaggeration. I love having family here, I was just already overstimulated before they got here.  My fix?  Five minutes locked away in my room so that I can blog.  Now I'm going to go take a shower.  After...blueberry pancakes.  Skip the asylum. 

overheard

I overheard this conversation while my 4 yr. old was playing with some toys...it just cracked me up!

"Cows in the jungle?"
"I don't see any cows in the jungle"
"that's because cows don't live in the jungle, city kid!"

automatic flushers

Have you ever noticed that the automatic flush for public restrooms wasn't really designed with kids in mind?  I can't tell you how many times I've taken one of my girls into a public stall and had the toilet flush while they are still sitting there only to scare the jeepers out of them! Since they aren't quite tall enough yet, the sensor sometimes thinks they've left even when they haven't.  And then there is the added situation of it never flushing at all because it never sensed them in the first place, which doesn't matter quite so much because there is the little manual button.  Still, you should see the startled look in their eyes when they are sitting there peacefully taking care of business and suddenly, without warning, there comes the thundering Niagara Falls-noise of the super-powered public flush and occasionally a slight sprinkle from the upsurge. I think it has happened enough times now that they are getting used to it - they don't seem to instinctively leap away in terror anymore :)  I've tried standing there directly in front of them in order to fool the sensor, but inevitably they can't reach the toilet paper and so when I lean over to help - you got it - flush!

Exposing myself

When my sister started her blog in 2007, she included a few posts called "mama exposed."  The idea was to expose some of her imperfections - the fish that were swimming in murky tanks, the messy closets she couldn't get to, etc....   I think that we all have things that we'd rather not advertise because we want to appear to be good moms who have it all together.  But the reality of being a mom is that there is always something difficult, something we can't get to, somewhere that things are falling apart a little bit (or a lot), something we feel that we don't want to admit because we'd seem like terrible moms.  Little by little, I'm going to unveil some of those things in my life for you to take a peek at. Why? Just keepin' it real. As my husband is fond of pointing out; life is messy. (not just in the organizational sense)  Maybe you can relate and we can laugh a little.  Keep an eye out for "mama exposed."

            Here is a recent family photo: I love the looks on the girls faces - Hope is modeling the "life is perfect" fake mom-face, and Maddie is modeling the "mama exposed" face (not planned...just thought it was cute!)

Boys vs. Girls

Got this quote from Heather down in the ATL who got it from another friend Pat who got it from another hilarious blog...and so I'm passing it on, because yup, it's so true.....

"When you have a boy, you have to worry about one boy on the planet. When you have a girl, you have to worry about every boy on the planet."

Postcards from yo mama!

My hysterically funny and super smart friend Ally directed me towards this site - Postcards from yo mama!  As we are all appreciating mothers this Mother's Day, I know you'll enjoy appreciating all the funny ways moms express themselves.  This is a collection of email and IM messages that people's moms sent to them and that, for humor's sake, they then posted at this site.  "Moms" random and charming thoughts on life and love are truly funny - and (just as Ally said to me) while some of the humor can be a little blue, I find them totally endearing!

when preschoolers paint....

I love to let the girls paint, but their creativity and interest seem to stretch beyond the boundaries of the paper.  Somehow it always ends up like this.  No, I take that back - because this isn't where it ended.  I failed to get pictures of them using each other as full-body canvases shortly after this. I see their motive now in suggesting that they just paint in their underwear instead of donning their designated "painting" clothes.  No staying in the lines here......

4 yr old funnies

.....when Hope found that her spoon had been completely licked clean of brownie batter, she turned to her rather messy little sister.....

more quoteables

"Cleaning your house while your children are still growing,
is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing."
- Mary Kay Blakely

"Every child is born an artist.
The challenge is to remain one once he grows up."
- Picasso

"To a child, love is a four-letter word:
T-I-M-E."
- Dr. Cindy Nurik

"A mother never stands so tall as when she bends down
to help her child."
- unknown

"There are two lasting bequests we can give our children.
One is roots, the other is wings."
- Hodding Carter, Jr.

quotable, part 1

" To be a good housewife and mother, you have to be more self-generated.  You have to create your own playground of the imagination, and the mind.  To be a really good, creative mother you have to be an extraordinary woman.  You have to keep yourself involved with your child during great periods of the day when it's just the two of you and you feel that at any moment you may literally go out of your mind."
- Meryl Streep

"Having children is like having a bowling alley installed in your brains."
- Martin Mull

A former first lady said,
" You know, at the end of your life, you will never regret not having vacuumed the living room, not having made the bed or not ironing one more shirt.  But you will regret times not spend with a husband, a friend, a parent, a child."

" A mother holds her children's hands for a little while, their hearts forever."
-unknown

A morning in the life of mom

Got this email from a dear friend of mine (who will remain anonymous) and I just had to share it with you.  Now this is authentic parenting!!!!

My day so far-besides starting the day sick with my congestion and a significant cough:

9:00 let the hooligans out of their rooms, both arguing about what they won’t wear

9:15 breakfast

9:30 While I’m on phone with doctor’s office on hold for a bill I already paid for and have the receipt for, Baby Girl dumps bowl of milk on top of her hair. Despite quick attempts to wash it out, it is currently sticking straight up and has the consistency of straw. While cleaning that up, Little Boy stands on the fireplace and projectile spits an entire mouthful of milk all over the floor and carpet. I never did get through to the doctor’s since I had to get off the phone to deal with the kids.

 

The rest of the exact times are a blur now, it’s 11:30 currently:

 

-My mom calls. The cordless phone dies. I plug in the other phone. While plugging in other phone, Baby Girl pulls out the craft box. Little Boy finds the red glitter glue and spreads it all over the tv screen, couch, fireplace, children’s chairs and coffee table(in mere seconds). After cleaning that up and disciplining him, I call my husband to also give Little Boy a talking to. For the two minutes on the phone with my husband, Little Boy walks over to the corner and pees on the carpet. While I get off the phone and deal with him climbing on the dresser and peeing, Baby Girl takes out every beauty product and medication from under the sink. After I secure Baby Girl, Little Boy goes into the living room and dumps a glass full of milk on the floor(supposedly by accident). I decide at this point that I need coffee so we have a few serene minutes while Little Boy and Baby Girl help me make coffee. While I set up our craft, I realize Little Boy had misplaced a major piece of the craft in his morning dealings. I tell him to find it and he sweetly asks for help. While I help to look for it, he takes the opportunity to spray Windex from the entertainment center, still there from cleaning up the glitter glue, into my coffee and into Baby Girl’s eyes in one foul swoop. At this point, I put him in his room to think about his actions and locked the door, taking care of Baby Girl. I go pour a second cup of coffee. Upon taking it out of the microwave, I somehow lost hold of it, spilled hot coffee on every piece of clothing I had on and broke my favorite mug(however, glad to not spill it on Baby Girl). At this point I gave up and am writing this email! I’m still trying to decide if its in Little Boy’s best interest for survival to let him out of his room…

Easter Bunny? yeah right.

While Hope is fully willing to believe in Santa Claus, she's apparently a little too astute for a bunny who delivers colorful eggs and candy.  Here is the simple straightforward conversation we had recently - out of the blue, Hope asks:
"mom, is there really no Easter Bunny, right?"
me: "well, yes, not really"
Hope: "then who puts the stuff in my Easter basket?"
me: "well, who knows what kind of stuff you like?"
Hope: "you and daddy."
me: "yes."
Hope: contently "okay then."
So much for childhood fables, my girl is a realist.

Daddy Gymnastics

Oh the fun things daddy's are good for!

Rubber Ducky 101 week - lesson five

When choosing the perfect rubber ducky for your child:
Say yes to Dr. duck and superhero duck:

Say no to Bill Clinton:

Rubber Ducky 101 week - lesson four

When choosing the perfect rubber ducky for your child:
Say yes to designer ducks:

Say no to religious ducks (no offense here):

Rubber Ducky 101 week - lesson three

When choosing the perfect rubber ducky for your child -
Say yes to fun-loving party ducks

Say no to Kiss and Scream ducks

Rubber Ducky 101 week - lesson two

When choosing the perfect rubber ducky for your child:
Say yes to cool guitar-playing ducks

Say no to Ozzy and SnoopDog

Rubber Ducky 101 week - lesson one

When choosing the perfect rubber ducky for your child:
Say yes to Pink Ribbon and Camo ducks:

Say no to lingerie and PMS ducks:

suction-cup hands

Now there's an idea!  Wouldn't it be great if with the birth of your children, your palms suddenly developed certain powerful suction abilities?  That kiddo with the jelly-legs who refuses to come along with you - one reflexive movement by mom and SCHMOCK! stuck - no more wrestling with squirmy spaghetti limbs! The toddler who got into the chocolate syrup or the gooey honey or the mud puddle out back? SCHMOCK! rendered immobile and held free from gooping their mess all over mom's skin and clothes and the floor and the hallway and the stairs until safely released within the confines of the bathtub.  Got two squabblers? SCHMOCK! SCHMOCK! held apart by moms arm length until certain discipline can be administered.  Got a runaway? One who likes to dart at the moment you are communicating instructions? or step off the curb into traffic? SCHMOCK! stopped in their tracks! SCHMOCK! SCHMOCK! SCHMOCK! Oh, I like the sound of that! There are times when that would really come in handy!

Adagio for Elmo

I love the sense of humor of my friends - thanks to the Murphy's for this one!

budding entreprenuer?

My 4 year old and I at the sink last night while brushing her hair before bed:
Hope: (holding her toothbrush with the Dora picture on it) Mommy, I think I know how they make these
Me: really, how?
Hope: they take the Dora band-aids and stick them on the handle of the toothbrush
Me: like a sticker?
Hope: yeah
Me: that's good reasoning, Hope, it does look a bit like a sticker on the handle, doesn't it?.....
Hope: Can we make one?
Me: a toothbrush?
Hope: yeah, get a toothbrush and put the band-aids on it, make it ourselves
Me: sure we can do that, but we might want to choose stickers instead
Hope: no, it's band-aids and I want Barbie ones.  Then we can put the Barbie band-aids on the toothbrushes
to make our own and then we can take them to the store for other people
Me: That's a good idea, but it doesn't work exactly like that, I don't think the store will buy them from 
us.  Although, maybe as you get a bit older you will come up with some special creation that you can 
actually sell in a store, how would that be?
Hope: yeah, but can we just make a Barbie band-aid toothbrush? please?

what would Super Mom wear?

Today is a busy day for me as I juggle some much needed cleaning, taking care of my kids, doing some repairs around the house, planning dinner, planning a get-together tomorrow, and et cetera, et cetera....  Still I haven't managed to get a shower, get dressed or do anything with my hair.  So, I'm thinking it would be really nice on days like this when I already have to call on all my super mom powers if I could just rip off my outer wear and voila! Spiffy super mom uniform revealed! - and like the glowing-faced, toned super hero that I am not, I then can fly effortlessly away to my chores and superb parenting skills at least looking pulled together and like I'm actually ready for my job today.  So tell me, what would your Super Mom uniform look like?

instructions on caring for baby - humorous

Got these from this site (which is all in Russian, so I have no idea really what it is), where I was directed by my good (and also Russian) friend Lena.