Reston Mom

Shepherd's birthday

So tomorrow is the big day.  I'm scheduled for repeat cesarean at 9 am.  I feel like I should blog because as slack as I've been lately, I'm not sure when I'll get around to it again.  I do have things to post about, so maybe in the following days of recovery I'll be able to get them out of my brain and onto this blog.  

I feel like I should have something profound, or something at all, to say on the eve of my son's birth.  But, maybe I'm just tired or my head is in the pregnancy fog - but I don't really have anything for ya.

I'm excited, SO excited to meet my first son.  He will definitely hold a special place in our family. But, otherwise I'm just grateful to be finished with this pregnancy and as far as having a 4th goes, it just seems kind of normal this time.  There isn't the same hubbub about it all somehow.  It is still as miraculous and precious, but there is much more peace inside and outside of me.

So anyway, I'll try to get some pictures up soon and in the meantime any prayers are greatly, greatly appreciated.

some pictures from this fall

Here are just a smattering of pictures from this fall that I like.

a little fall decorating

I love to decorate for the seasons.  A few touches here and there just to celebrate - but this year I've been keeping it pretty simple.  Here are few things I've done:

I used to have something different on this wall, but was craving a change. The two white frames were in my basement and used to be a hideous gold color, but I liked the detail so I decided to paint and use them.  I had bought a straw wreath form last year and wanted something that said "warm and cozy" so I made this knitted creation.  I didn't have a picture for the other frame, but I had a $1 black mat from the dollar store, a black sheet of construction paper and a white art pencil - so...I penciled in a few words that characterized fall.  The three frames at the bottom cost $1 each on clearance at Michael's Craft Store.  I painted them the light green color left over from the accent wall in our home and trimmed them in the same white as the other frames.  The leaves are real leaves that I pressed.  Since I had most of the materials, it cost me next to nothing.  I haven't decided if I love it, but I definitely like it and it is all easy to change out for other seasons.

I spent a moment updating the girls' container play garden in the backyard from summer to fall.  The mini-pumpkins are obviously fake - they have to be or the squirrels eat them.  I also spent some time with the girls earlier this season making these rainbow webs from yarn and some sticks to hang from the playhouse window.  

Guarding time for our children

Really appreciated this post: http://jenwilkin.blogspot.com/2010/10/guarding-sabbath-for-our-children.html and know that myself and a lot of other NOVA moms I know would benefit from it.....

Hollin farm and pumpkin patch

A fall family tradition for the past 3 years has been to visit Hollin Farm in Delaplane to cut our own pumpkins.  It is beautiful out there at the foothills - especially during this time of year when all the leaves are changing.  We like the pumpkin patch - which features a variety of cut-your-own pumpkins and gourds and it is fun to cut the kids loose to find their perfect pumpkin.  There is really nothing super fancy about this place, but that is what we love.  There is a corn maze and fresh farm apples for sale - and just a whole lot of fresh air and room to run around and pumpkins! A drive west always makes me feel refreshed.

what tremendous resolve

I was just thinking again today about the tremendous resolve of my 4 yr. old, Maddie.  I already mentioned that she decided to quit sucking her thumb.  Well, it was a done deal from the moment she made the decision.  There hasn't been any going back since.

One thing I noticed however, is that she is suddenly a lot less attached to her stuffed puppy.  Puppy used to go everywhere with us and was highly requested -whenever she was tired, frustrated, sad, bored, etc.... Puppy sort of became a beloved member of the family over the past nearly 5 years.  Her dad bought it for her in the hospital when she was born and she has loved that thing to shreds.  Except, now we never see him.  He stays in her bed all day and really isn't requested at all.  

I thought this made sense, since previously at the moment she saw puppy, in went the thumb.  The two always went together.  

But then, there was a new realization.  One evening when we were tucking her in, puppy was at the end of her bed and she kind of refused him when offered.  The thing is that Maddie, realizing that holding puppy made her want to suck her thumb, made her own conscious decision to put away puppy as necessary in order to stop sucking her thumb.  What child does that?  I mean, this stuffed animal was seriously BELOVED.  Her decisions go deep.  When she resolves to do something, she follows through and she takes whatever steps are necessary to do so. She knows herself and takes stock before she commits, so her commitments are real.  How she manages to do something that I and many adults fail at frequently is beyond me.  I could take a lesson from her.  And as I said before, I hope that she will retain that trait and that it will serve her well.  

I caught her snuggling with her puppy in bed the other night when I checked on her before going to bed myself - but, she wasn't sucking her thumb.  

what pregnancy is really like

So this is the final time around and I figured I'd better have a picture.  I'm not really one for photo shoots, but we were dressed up recently for a wedding and I was going to let Matt snap a few shots.  It was the end of the day and I was tired, I guess, because as soon as Matt started taking pictures, I started crying - for no apparent reason, mind you, except maybe hormones.  And...the only pictures we got that look decent are of my face all squinched up or me wiping away tears.  They are on Matt's phone right now and he is away at a conference, so even though I have a moment to post, I can't put them up today - but that just gives you something to look forward to.  And, maybe we'll try to take a couple of pictures again sans the crying. Sometimes when you are preggo that is just the way it goes down, at least I'll have pictures to remember what pregnancy is really like.  

so darn proud of that girl

Maddie has this particular facet of her personality that is really amazing.  She can be extremely stubborn - but the positive side of that if she makes up her mind to do something, she just does it.  The decisive follow through of that small child is a wonder. 

For instance, she stopped sucking her thumb this week.  Yep.  Let me set the scene for you - she has sucked her thumb since infancy whenever she was sleepy.  Also, she has a stuffed puppy (which serves as her security blanket) and it has long gone hand in hand with the thumb sucking.  As soon as she saw puppy, in went the thumb.  And for years, puppy went everywhere with us.  Serious attachments to thumb and puppy, folks.

But, at her last two dentist appointments, the dentist has commented that if we want to avoid problems to her teeth caused by thumb sucking, we ought to try to start working on breaking the habit.  This was kind of like receiving mission impossible in my mind.  We began to talk to her a little bit about it, but she got upset at the idea.  See, she hadn't made up her own mind yet.

Earlier this week, Matt randomly offered an incentive to her for bedtime.  He asked her if she'd like to try having a bandaid wrapped around her thumb and then if it was still on in the morning and she hadn't sucked on it, he would give her a quarter.  The first night failed.  She cried at bedtime and took off the bandaid. We didn't make a big deal about it, I actually pretty much expected as much.

But - and here is what always happens - at some point she made a decision for herself and once the turn is made, she makes it hard and follows through.  I guess sometime during the next day she made up her mind either that the quarter was really worth it or that it was going to help her teeth or both, because that night (no prompting from us) she stuck out her thumb and asked for a bandaid.  And the next morning she casually showed it to her dad and received her quarter.  Nor did she suck her thumb again that day.  The next evening she again asked for a bandaid.  When I tucked her in, as part of our prayers, I prayed that God would continue to help her with her endeavor and she looked at me like I was crazy and said "nothing is different here mom, except that I'm not sucking my thumb," like it was no big deal. 

She hasn't sucked her thumb since.  Last night, she wanted a bandaid again but when I went to put it on her thumb she had a hard time remembering which one she sucked on (it hasn't even been a full week) and said "I just don't know mom 'cause I just don't feel like sucking my thumb."

She is four.  I don't know many 4 yr. olds who just make a decision to stop sucking their thumb.  But this is only one example of her immense follow-though.  I tell you, once she decides something, there isn't any wish-wash or debate or crisis...she just does it.  The key is, it has to be her decision.  I hope that it is a trait that she'll long carry and I hope it will serve her well and that the decisions she makes and carries through will be wise.  It is fascinating to see the unfolding of the individual traits God has given to each of my children.  This particular one in Maddie amuses and amazes me so!

c-section stuff not in books

I've got about a month to go until our son is born, but I've been pondering the birth.  It seems like you can find technical and medical information in books and resources about what will happen if you have to have a c-section but there isn't always that kind of advice you are looking for from someone who has been there.

I've been there three times before, so I'm kind of prepared for what to expect this round if everything goes well.  I just thought that I'd share a few things I've learned along the way and will definitely put into practice myself this time, just in case for some reason you find that a c-section delivery is necessary for you.

- Drink lots of water in the hospital, maybe hot tea - but avoid juice, soda, and milk for at least a day or two. Go with the liquid diet the first day even if the doc says you are allowed to eat other food and you are feeling hungry.  One of the uncomfortable parts of recovery is getting your gastro-intestinal tract back into smooth functioning.  You'll need to pass gas - and you'll be asked about this - but you don't really want to build up gas more than is necessary because it will be extremely painful - so the tips above really help with that. Plus, you're doc will also be looking for you to poop too and lots of water will help things stay softer.  Also, when you finally do start eating regular foods again - go for food that has some fiber in it and eat a moderate amount (don't over eat even if you are really hungry).

 - Take the medicine!  Now anesthetics can work differently for different people.  I've had an epidural, and epidural/spinal combo and a spinal and the spinal definitely worked the best for me.  But in all cases, you eventually come off that anesthesia and start taking a painkiller in the form of pills. Alternating Percocet and Tylenol (I think it is Tylenol 3 or something like that) which is pretty standard -so that they overlap works wonders for me.  The trick is to not let the pain get out of hand, because once it does it is really, really miserable and takes some time to get back to comfort again.  DON'T try to tough out the pain at any time, BE ASSERTIVE with your nursing staff and if you are uncomfortable at all TELL THEM.  I tell my nurses to just go ahead and bring me the medicine as often as I can have it and if for some reason they are slightly behind on time, I don't hesitate to ring for them.  Those medications are safe for the nursing baby and in the long run will help you.  You cannot recover well and deal with caring for a new baby if you can't sleep or rest because you are in agony.  You just had major abdominal surgery and pain management is necessary - so make good use of it so that you can get better!  I've been through poor pain management and good pain management - and good pain management after the surgery is key to a good experience. LISTEN TO YOUR BODY.

 - Let people help you, especially if you are not used to it.  The nursing staff has to take care of you in some ways that challenge modesty and are a little uncomfortable for the self-sufficient or private person.  Get over it. Let them help. Also, enlist help from your family, friends, husband - whoever is there.  Stop doing everything yourself even if you can.  Ask for what you need, ask for what you want. Manage, delegate, and then rest! Rest is very important.  Don't worry about getting out of bed in the middle of the night to pick up the baby yourself because your husband is sleeping and you don't want to disturb him - wake him up! Ask him to bring the baby to you.  Or the nurses.  Or wake someone up for water if you need it.  Take advantage of the help you have now to get better for when you have less help later.

- Tell your nurses what you need.  If you need pain medication, make sure they bring it to you on time. You'll have lots of people coming in during the night to check on you - check your blood pressure, bring you medicine, check on the baby, ask you questions - it can get really annoying and can definitely interrupt your ability to sleep and get the rest you need to heal and take care of new baby.  Just tell them you want them to come as infrequently as possible.

- Use the nursery if you need rest.  One of the hardest things to get over is letting go of that precious new little one.  Mom often doesn't want baby out of sight.  I get that and I keep my baby right with me as much as possible.  But again, rest is necessary for you to be a good mom and to recover well.  The nurses who work in the nursery love babies and take good care of them.  If you need to send the baby to the nursery for a couple hours so that you can sleep - DO IT.  They will bring them back to you when they get hungry or whenever you request.  In the meantime, your precious bundle will sleep peacefully under the watchful eye of someone else while you actually get some sleep.  Being a new mom isn't easy - rest helps perspective a lot - for mom and dad.  As I said before, let someone help you. 

- Pack clothing (or send hubby for clothes) that are old and comfy and will fit your still poofy and now sore belly.  Soft underwear with a wide band or no band at all are the best - though the hospital will provide funny mesh underwear for you which you may or may not prefer.  PJ pants that are loose in the waist and soft and a loose t-shirt are great.  You will still bleed and need to wear a pad even if you don't deliver vaginally - so old clothes are best.  Bring a robe and some socks or slippers for walking around the hospital in.  Let someone help you in the shower and to get on and off the toilet.  You will be sore and need this help at first - especially if you labored before the c-section, your legs will also be quite wobbly.  

- Bring a Boppy Pillow to the hospital to help support the baby while you feed him.

- You may shake a lot at first after the surgery - something like shivering.  This is completely normal and due to the anesthesia.  It may be uncomfortable or strange at first, but just try to relax your breathing and rest, it will go away after a short while.

- You probably will not want visitors the first day.  You may choose to make exceptions for your parents or best friend, but it is wise to have your husband tell everyone else not to come before later on the second day.

- Recovery is not fun, but it does happen.  The body is amazing - absolutely astounding.  You will still need to prepare for some restrictions at home however.  Again, ask for help as much as you can get it. While you are in the hospital, think positively.  Use these couple of days where you don't have to think about preparing meals, or cleaning up after them, or taking care of a house, etc... to rest and to pray and to bond with your baby.  Take the time to stare at your precious newborn, to talk to your husband, to work on nursing (make use of the lactation consultant).  You may be working on recovering and stuck at the hospital for a few days, but make use of the rare opportunity to put all the rest of the world and everyone else's needs aside and just be with your husband and your baby - that time can be a very precious commodity.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

kids say cute things

My kids have had some really cute things come out of their mouths lately, and since this is kind of the place where I "scrapbook" things, I wanted to be sure to write them down.

Maddie: "Hope, you and I have a friendship like I'm peanut butter and you're jelly!"

Me:"Maddie, I need to wash your puppy" aka: her stuffed security animal Maddie: "no, I don't want you to because mom, then he'll smell clean!!!"

Me with broom ready to sweep up the tons of cheerios Ami poured out.  Hope on floor: "wait wait mom! I just want to spell out my name first!"

And while Ami's vocabulary continues to grow rapidly, she still gives every affirmative answer as "aye!" unwaveringly.  Never a yes, always an "aye!"   Are you hungry? "aye!"  Do you want some milk? "aye!"  Do you want to play outside? "aye!"  - the inflection changes to suit the mood of the question, but "yes" is ALWAYS "aye!"  and it is terribly cute!

new fave fall muffin recipe

This is my new favorite fall muffin recipe - Pumpkin Cornmeal Muffins from Real Simple.   They are really tasty without being too overly sweet - and overall, they aren't so bad for you either.  I think I'll try substituting some plain yogurt or apple sauce for the butter next time for a lower fat version. They would be great with some chopped apples in them too  - or actually, if you are into interesting stuffing/dressing recipes for Thanksgiving, you could break up these with some onion, apple, salt, and herbs and make a really nice pumpkin/cornbread stuffing for your turkey.  In any case, these hit the spot especially with a little pad of butter and if your sweet tooth desires, a drizzle of honey.  Mmmmmmmmmm.........

On a further note, the pumpkin farmers must be up and running again this season because I actually did manage to find a 15 oz can of Libby's pumpkin at my Safeway!  Hooray!  We're back in business for pumpkin pancakes, Paula Dean's Pumpkin Ziti, and muffins of course...not to mention pie.  I love fall.

just for the (hospital) record

If you are going to give birth in this area and are choosing a hospital, I just thought I'd add my experience to the pot if it helps any.

I have delivered at Reston Hospital and Fairfax INOVA, both times I stayed for 3 days at least due to c-section. 

I guess I can't comment too much about the facilities at Reston since they have been totally re-done since the time Maddie was born - and I believe there is now some kind of NIC unit there while there wasn't before.  I can say that my experience with the nursing staff wasn't great.  It wasn't really terrible either, but definitely not the best I've had in three c-sections.  I know a lot of people who have had fine experiences there and logistically we had no problems.  

Fairfax has had a bit of a bad reputation I think.  "Baby factory" comes to mind.  It is a very busy hospital. We were told ahead of time that we might feel like "just a number" and be quickly rushed in and out, etc.... Fortunately, this was not the case at all.  My best birthing experience of three hospitals was here.  I love their family focus - the baby was allowed to stay with my husband and me for the entire time immediately following birth and we had the say of when to release her to the nursery.  It was so comforting to not have her whisked away to be cleaned and taken care of and then returned later after I was out of the recovery room and into my patient room.  The nursing staff was very kind, informative, and helpful. (Though, I was probably a bit more assertive by the third time).  We did not feel like a "number" even though it was evident that the hospital was busy. 

When I was pregnant with Ami, the doctor who delivered Maddie at Reston (I really liked my doc by the way) was not practicing there anymore.  Actually, if I recall correctly, she traveled somewhere to be a missionary.  So, not having any attachment to a doctor, we chose another practice and hospital for Ami's birth.  I found a doctor I like who was very familiar with multiple c-sections (having three herself) at a practice I really love with residency at Fairfax Inova.  Fairfax was my first choice because it has the best NICU in the area and should anything have happened, I wanted to be recovering in the same hospital as my baby.  

So, anyway, that is my limited experience with hospitals in the area, but I hope it helps someone out.

two strange things about pregnancy

Each pregnancy is a little different, just as each child is quite different.  Even after four pregnancies, I have still had some new experiences this time around.  Here are a couple that kind of surprised me:

 - this kid is so heavy on my bladder that I can't tell by sensation when I'm finished peeing.  Honestly, I just have to listen to know when I'm done.  Ha! 

- I'm not able to eat as much at one time anymore because there isn't much room.  The other night, the baby squished upward so much that I actually had a separate little bulge between my rib cage where my stomach was sticking out and I really thought for a moment that I might throw up.  He still makes me a bit nauseated sometimes when he stretches so hard upwards like that. 

the baseball diamond is a great place to learn

 If you can get to a baseball diamond at a park or school somewhere nearby when it is not being used, it can turn into a really fun chance to do some learning.

When the days turn nice out, it is difficult for us to hunker down over textbooks inside, so we find ways to get out of the house.  Plus, tactile learning is often helpful and fun.  

A good example of this is hitting the baseball diamond.  All you need is some clothes that you don't mind getting dirty, some long and short sticks, and a few ideas.  

Writing in the sand is something the kids enjoy (actually, I think it is pretty fun too) and if they get restless, you can just send them on a run around the bases.  Even toddlers will enjoy and be kept busy by writing in the sand while you practice with the older kids.

Here are some ideas for preschool and elementary age groups:

preschool : 

- write out shapes, numbers, or letters in the sand.  Say them and see if your child can trace or draw their own.  

- practice teaching your kids to count using tally marks in the sand - either let them practice drawing the straight lines as you count or let them do the crosswise swipe with a flourish to complete each 5.

- draw dots and see if your child can connect them

- draw long straight lines for jumping over and trails to follow and "balance on" 

- teach them to draw their name

elementary:

- kids can do any kind of written subject practice - math, handwriting, spelling, etc... in the sand.  

- simple diagrams work well in the sand too - solar system, graphs, clocks, maps, plant parts, etc...

- give the kids a question to think about and have them each draw their solutions in the sand and then compare (for example, tanagrams: can you use four triangles to make a big square? etc...)

- if you bring rulers or measuring tape you can do geometry, or if not, you can just use the length of your feet as a general measurement.

- play word games such as hangman or using the letters of one or two words to create as many new words as you can

- bring something that will stand up and create a sundial on the field to observe throughout the time you are there. 

little nummies

I just thought this site was fun.  If you are like me, you probably don't have a lot of time to play with the food to make creative little surprises for your kiddos.  Nor are most of these extremely healthy - but, I still thought it was a lot of fun.  I actually scrolled through the entire site - and if you find a moment to do the same, you are sure to find something that you and your kids will adore and that is pretty easy.  I thought this would be a great idea to surprise all those kiddos coming home from their first days of school - who wouldn't love a snack in a playful shape? 

Check out Little Nummies for some inspiration and have fun playing with your food!

more kid music

 Did you know that Pandora has channels for kiddos?  This might help if you are tired of the same cd that your kid always requests.  I was just made aware of these, so I haven't actually listened to any of them yet - but I'm anxious to give them a try especially on car trips or during clean-up time in the house.  

Toddler Radio – Meant for kids 4 and under, this station is educational and fun! A variety of toddler-friendly themes and music genres are explored. Look for Sesame Street, Disney, & The Wiggles among others.

Lullabye – Meant for kids 5 and under, this station is designed to prepare your tyke for a nap or bedtime (or any time you want to bring the energy level down a notch). It's full of mellow sounds and sweet lullabies.

Radio for Kids – Meant for kids 7 and under, this station is fun, educational, and not too baby-ish. For kids who are moving on up from Toddler Radio. Many musical genres are included here, and due to the variety and quality of songs, it's enjoyable for kids and adults!

Rockin' Kids Radio – Meant for kids 7 and under. This one is my personal favorite; an energetic station good for dancing, room-cleaning and high-energy play. This station is a winner for kids (and adults!) who love upbeat music. Rock out, kiddos.

Tween Radio – Meant for ages 8 to adult. This station is appropriate for those too old for children's music but a bit too young for rock 'n' roll's more adult themes. It includes pop music favorites like Miley Cyrus, The Jonas Brothers, and the cast from “High School Musical.”

Just the six of us

Well, four kids doesn't seem like a huge family to me - it feels full and good, but normal too.  I say that, and then when I see a family of six walking along, my reflex is still to say - oh that's a big family.  Until I count them, and realize that is what my family is looking like.  

I do notice a few tell-tale signs that our family has grown.  Here are a few things that clue me in to the fact that even if we aren't a huge family, we aren't a very small family either.

 - I load and unload the dishwasher at least twice a day, and that is with strong efforts to conserve from creating any excess dirty dishes and aside from hand washing pots and pans and such.

 - a few grocery items just don't go as far.  We go through almost an entire gallon of milk each day (think three kids who drink milk at three meals and I use it to make their oatmeal in the morning and then if Matt or I happen to want a glass or I need it as an ingredient in baking/cooking, well...) We can go through almost an entire loaf of bread in one lunch if we all have sandwiches.  We can also go through an entire bag of tortilla chips in one lunch as well.  I'm learning how to stretch ingredients to make them go farther these days.

 - laundry is never, ever, ever, caught up

 - if we all go out to eat, we are going to have to ask for a table for six (one highchair, one booster for a little while) - thereby making our wait longer and our options fewer (few restaurants have booths that hold six).  Needless to say, we won't be going out as much - mostly because of the cost.  Although, we have found some good ways to cut cost and eat out with kids).

 - often recreation = $$$   It is definitely much more costly to take six people to see a movie or to an amusement park or even on a relatively inexpensive trip if it requires lodging.  For now, we're the kind of family that has to plan ahead for these things and save them for special occasions.  We're learning to take advantage of a lot of great free recreation activities.

 - babysitting - first, paying for someone to watch 4 kids is more expensive.  second, finding someone who you trust to take care of all four kids at the same time can be difficult.  third, it is just less convenient.  A good friend or regular babysitter might be called upon fairly frequently to watch one or even two kids on short notice so that mom can run to the grocery store, the gym, or have dinner with her husband.  But, I couldn't ask someone to take four kids in that same way because I know what that entails regarding time, energy, and flexibility.  It definitely needs to be planned on and prepared for ahead of time.  Thank God for wonderful grandmas!

 - carrying stuff - this especially applies to a larger family of younger children.  I've definitely noticed that we're lugging around more stuff.  Even when we streamline as best as possible.  In the winter, four coats, scarves, mitten sets, and hats is very bulky.  Just try going to a friends house or a restaurant and see how much of their coat closet this takes up! In the summer, we're loaded down with bottles of drinking water, sun hats, sunglasses, etc.. to keep up with.  Not to mention a short trip to the pool - with all the towels, toys, floaties, snacks and drinks to carry along, you'd think we were going to the beach for a week to look at us.  Of course, there is usually a packed diaper bag in tow too - the more little ones there are, the more bulky the bag.  

 There are more examples then these.  And maybe these all seem like things that are rather undesirable, but it is just the result of there being more.  There are more people and that requires more of almost everything, that's for sure.  But it also means that there is more of the good stuff too - the special moments, the baby kisses, the funny and unique personalities.  More bedtime snuggles, more triumphant moments, more laughter, more people to play a good game together, more hands to help.  

My own experience with our size family has been that it is a whole lot less convenient, but very very satisfying too.

maybe she got the organizing gene

I gave Ami her cup and snack.  She ran off to the living room with them. Then she came back for a napkin. A few minutes later, I came out to see this neat little picnic arranged completely by her.  Who knew she had a knack for neatness? God bless her, I hope she keeps it! So cute. 

 

Homeschooling for the curious - your questions

Here are a few questions I've been asked -

When do you find time for curriculum planning?

    WELL, this is a tough one for me - one of the challenges I forgot to mention.  I don't really have a good set time or schedule for planning right now, which definitely would be useful.  At some point in the future, I'm absolutely going to have to plan a weekend retreat on occasion or "teacher work day" or something because trying to fit it in when I can in the evenings or weekends just doesn't work out well - and especially won't as subjects become more advanced.  For now, I have realized that this is a challenge and have specifically chosen curriculum materials that don't require much planning ahead on my part.  I can competently get away with that at a kindergarten and 2nd grade level.  Of course I actually do some thinking ahead though.  I have a planner book where I write out our subject lessons for each day about a month at a time.  This gets adjusted though as sometimes we move through things more quickly or slowly than expected.  Also, I find that crafty/creative stuff takes more time and prep. so I often have to think ahead about that.  And, I keep post-it notes in my notebook on each week for things like what materials we will need for science that week so that I can take a look beforehand and know what I need to gather up. When a family decides to pursue home education, they will need to take the needed prep time into consideration when choosing an approach/methodology as some really do require much more time.

What about socialization?

     This is always an interesting question.  I've never been hung up on this one.  When we decided to homeschool our children, it wasn't for the purpose of isolating them from others.  Our kids have neighborhood friends that they spend a good amount of time playing with and they make friends everywhere they go.  From time to time they participate in a group activity such as a dance class.  They also participate with their peers in class settings at church and in our supplementary program (Classical Conversations).  I have never noticed my children having a problem with awkwardness around other children or with creating relationships.  Another thing is that outside of the years spent in school, people are never completely surrounded by peers of their own age.  Adults intermingle in the workplace, social spheres, family, etc... with a variety of ages.  They are exposed to attitudes, thoughts, and behaviors that span generations.  I'm not worried about the fact that my children aren't surrounded by others all day whose age, maturity, and wisdom does not surpass their own.  I'm not convinced that they are missing any benefit there.  I sometimes wonder if that rather has the possibility of creating an isolated, false, and narrow view of the world - but I don't mean to digress with my own pondering.  As I've said, my children still continue to make friends their own age and engage in the appropriate social behaviors.  I don't want this to come across as unkind, but it seems to me that children who are very socially awkward, inappropriate, or otherwise challenged usually come from a family where the parents are a bit awkward themselves.  We are all different and that is great - but parents who generally enjoy and participate in social situations and don't isolate their children from doing likewise don't really need to worry about "socialization" in my opinion.  

easiest DIY play stove EVER!

I needed a storage option for some toys that are out in the girls' playhouse in the backyard - including some plastic food and dishes.  They like to play house/store out there and so after I bought this cheap 3-drawer plastic storage container, I decided to use a sharpie to turn the top of it into a stove so that they could play cook outside.  Voila!  And there is convenient storage for all the little foods and dishes underneath.  

This would be great inside too for toddlers while mom is working in the kitchen and could easily be pushed into a pantry or wherever when wanted out of sight.  

 

Amelia's vocabulary

 Listening to Ami today, I've been fascinated again by the development of speech in babies/children.  It is so neat to see them absorb so much and then begin to produce words.  It is clear that they understand so very much before they are able to speak about it - but it seems like when they finally start to make words for themselves, things just take off.  These are the words Ami uses right now, at least the ones I can remember.  Each of our girls have been different - Hope was speaking clearly in series of full sentences by the time she was two - it is funny to go back now and watch videos and see such a small person talking!  Maddie took more time, but certainly has had no problem.  Ami has always been a really great communicator - she could make her desires known well before she started speaking.  I think she's a bit of a go-getter.  But now that the words are coming, they just seem to be multiplying rapidly.  That might be my favorite part, just seeing how when something clicks in the brain for little ones they seem so rapid and unstoppable.  Once a kid is talking well, it becomes so difficult to remember a time when they didn't.  Even though I'm enjoying Ami's expanding vocabulary, I'm also taking in all of the adorable expressive babbling, the pointing, taking me by hand to show me something, turning my face to look at her while she babbles, etc... This is such a precious stage!

mama

dad

Hope

Maddie

up

cup

down 

boom 

whoa

uh-oh

hi

bye

night-night

bite

bellybutton

meow

duck

octopus

amen

five

book

eye

nose

more

shoes

open

no

please

mine

homeschooling for the curious - challenges we face

No matter what route you choose in life, there are bound to be challenges.  Homeschooling presents it's own particular ones and again it may vary from family to family.  Challenges that one family tackles successfully my seem insurmountable to another family.  These are just a few of the ones we have found in our own home along the way:

- Homeschooling with a variety of ages

       I get asked a lot about this one.  People want to know how I have been educating Hope while Maddie has been too young for school - and now how we will accomplish teaching two students with a toddler and a newborn in tow.  I don't have a special secret or flawless plan for this.  All I can say is that we have spent a lot of time over the years building in the "family is a team" mentality.  The girls understand the necessity of sharing divided time and caring for each other.  Also, my own personality comes into play here, I think.  I've never been a huge coddler - I'm confident that each of my children feels nurtured, but I've just never been one to hover. So, all of my children thus far have learned early on to be able to entertain themselves. Usually, the little ones just play while I teach the older ones.  I could never get used to a sling/carrier of any sort, so my babies have always just played in a floor gym or on a blanket next to us as we did our learning. I've been extremely blessed to have pretty independent, mild tempered babies.  Ami likes to climb on me sometimes while I am instructing, which is distracting and uncomfortable, but we just roll with it knowing that there is going to be little ones in and out of our study space and interested in what we are doing.  There are some toys in our school room too to keep the little ones busy.  

- Teaching different grades simultaneously

       This is new to us and still an interesting challenge, but the girls are patient and doing well.  Since we don't use something like a "thematic" approach, I am actually teaching two different levels of math, etc... Some things overlap very nicely however.  This may become more challenging over time, I"d bet, but as Hope gets older she is able to do more and more independent work which frees up time for me to teach lessons to Maddie.  Eventually, Hope will be able to help me teach the younger ones as well.  We just take turns as best as possible to address the needs of both children as they work and it is going fine for now.

- Personalities

        I'm just going to be frank about this - kids personalities are like adults, just very different from person to person.  You will probably naturally "get along" better with one child than another.  That is just life.  You can love them all tremendously, but it doesn't mean that you won't end up with a personality that can just grate on you.  Hope and I are extremely close, but she has the potential to drive me absolutely batty.  This is probably because she is just like me.  Sometimes, you may have siblings with a similar personality clash.  This is a challenge that has to be met day by day with love and understanding, grace and patience.  I require a lot of prayer in these areas.  But, I hope that as we come together this way in our own family, that we are teaching our children (and ourselves) how to practice more love, understanding, grace, and patience with the people we interact with outside our home as well.  

- Bad days

        Sometimes a child is tired or not feeling 100% well (the same goes for mommies).  There are days when there is whining, crying, moping, defiance, refusal, frustration...you get the picture.  There are just times when learning at home is hard.  The phrase, dare I say it,  "I hate school!" may even come into play.  As exhausting as those moments are, I don't take them too personally.  The same would be true if our kids were in any other school.  I find that usually the culprit is being too tired, being sick, or being frustrated about something in particular.  It takes tons of patience on my part to dig a little deeper to find what lies at the bottom of the meltdown, but it is actually a plus of homeschooling in my opinion to be able to take the time to address and nurture the root issues with my children.  The flexibility to stop and take a nap if someone is really desperate and come back to what we were working on later in a better frame of mind is wonderful.  There is great encouragement on the other side of these difficult moments instead of lingering negative feelings.  Plus, there is great opportunity to practice forgiveness toward one another.  Sometimes it is mommy that is having the bad day and I find the culprit is my own inflexibility or impatience or harshness.  I have to humble myself and admit to my children that even mommies act poorly sometimes and ask for their forgiveness.  I have learned so much about myself and my children in this process - we are growing and learning together and in ways that go much deeper than just book knowledge.  Sometimes we learn as much through a bad day as we do through a great, productive day.  

- Discipline

         Hope's kindergarten year was a good test year to determine if mom could be disciplined day in and day out.  Teaching my children is just like I took a full-time job.  It requires some planning, lots of thought and care, time during the day, etc...  It can get very tiring and routine sometimes.  I find that I suffer from Spring Fever and Winter Blues as much as children do.  There are days (especially when I had morning sickness) that I just didn't want to put in the time or the effort.  Sometimes, all I needed was a brief change in our schedule to allow an extra hour at the playground. On a rare occasion, mom would just give everyone a day off.  Referring back to the first post I did in this series, it is always the "why" that keeps me truckin. 

          In the same way, discipline is required of the children - as it is in any other school situation. While there is much freedom in learning, I also much teach my children that there are times to focus, study, and learn in a disciplined manner.  It is reasonable for them to learn to pay attention for a certain period of time.  These are skills that actually have to be taught, trust me. But they are skills they need to possess, and it keeps us sane. 

          On an added note: I can't imagine anyone trying to educate at home without first establishing some respect for parental authority in the home.  If your children have not been taught to receive your guidance and correction - if you are their peer and not their parent, home education may not go well for you.  

There are certainly other challenges and maybe I have forgotten some of them or haven't yet encountered others - if you have specific questions that I didn't address, feel free to ask!

Homeschooling for the curious - daily schedule

A day of school at home has to meet the needs of the family, the home, the educational purposes, etc... It can look very different for each family according to many variables.  This is just what works for us. And, because it is working for us right now doesn't mean that it won't change - there are slight changes every season and I re-evaluate our daily schedule each year.  Also, we tend to have an intentional routine daily schedule which I plan beforehand.  This aligns well with my own personality and the Classical methodology that we use.  I also find that a certain amount of consistency really helps my children from day to day as well as helping me to honestly assess our progress.  

One of the perks of our schedule at home is that we aren't rushed by the bell.  If something needs a little more time or catches our interest for further investigation, we can take some extra time.  If we manage to move more quickly, time is freed up.  We can take a break if someone is really frustrated or tired or hungry or if mommy needs to take some time to address discipline or character or change a baby's diaper, etc... So, even though our schedule is written out and we do try to stick to it, it has flexibility and flows more organically than maybe it appears on paper.  

Another thing is that my husband's day off from work is Monday.  This means family day and we do not do school but reserve the day entirely with great commitment for spending time all together.  We also have our supplementary program on Wednesday morning, I give Hope a piano lesson in the afternoon and Maddie is enrolled in a dance workshop for 8 weeks this fall in the afternoon, therefore we do not follow this schedule on Wednesdays either.  It is basically a 3 day schedule for us and we do manage to accomplish everything we need to during those days which is another perk of homeschooling.  If someone gets sick or it becomes necessary, we can do some additional work on Saturday morning. 

As of the beginning of this year - this is basically the schedule we are following, though I tend to push the time in the morning a bit more as the weather cools so we can go for a walk or get outside before school too for a short while.

6 am - Mom gets up 

7 am - by now all three girls are up

girls dress, brush, eat breakfast (often times I read to them at their request while they eat), perhaps play a little, Mom gets time with Ami to read or play

9 am - Ami takes a morning nap, Hope and Maddie and Mom begin the school day with the Bible and prayer.  Followed by practicing the history timeline.

Next, Hope and Maddie take out their pencil boxes and first two books.  We work on handwriting and then Math while seated.  With time before lunch we will work on our memory work for Classical Conversations (this may include songs, movement, drawing, etc...)  

About 11 am - Ami is up, the girls get a break while mom prepares lunch.  Then we eat lunch together - Mom reads from our History book or other books.  If we ran short on time and need to, we'll finish reviewing our memory work. 

Following lunch is reading time.  Hope reads from a chapter book, Mom works with Maddie.  If there is time before naps, Maddie may join Hope and Mom during spelling and science lessons.  Otherwise, she plays with Ami.

About 1:30 - Ami and Maddie take an afternoon nap.  Mom and Hope will finish up spelling and science if needed.   Otherwise, this is quiet time in our house.  Hope has "restful time" and mom catches up on housework, computer, preparations for dinner, etc....

By around 3 everyone is up again and the afternoon is ours for hitting the playground, doing a craft/activity, playing with friends, running errands or whatever.

5 pm - Matt is home from work and we all have dinner together.  Post dinner is family time with Ami going to bed first around 6:30 and then we read a bedtime story and pray together before Hope and Maddie are in bed between 7:30 and 8 pm.  

8 pm - 10 pm is mom and dad alone time, which Matt and I try very hard to reserve exclusively for hanging out with each other - even if we're just relaxing, no work allowed! 

10 pm - bedtime!

homeschooling for the curious - what curriculum we use

There is a ton of stuff out there and some of it is really good.  Plus, there are gobs of resources.  These are the curricula materials that we have decided on for now, but it doesn't mean we won't switch if something else will suit us better or take advantage of other materials alongside of these.  So far, we have been happy with our choices.

First, just as a side note and an addendum to the last homeschooling post where I mentioned approach - it might be helpful to know that we have chosen a Classical approach to learning in our home.  We are therefore enrolled in a supplementary program, Classical Conversations, that meets in age-group classes once a week.  Here, the girls get to engage with their peers in various science experiments, art projects, memory work, etc... But it is only a supplemental program and we work through several subjects at home.  We do follow a schedule and use specific curriculum. Here is what we are using this year:

Math - Math U See (both Hope and Maddie use this curriculum)

Science - A Reason for Science (Hope uses the curriculum, though Maddie participates in the observations/experiments)

Spelling - All About Spelling (Hope uses the curriculum, though Maddie works on the phonograms too)

Handwriting - Maddie is using A Reason for Handwriting, Hope is journaling each day with a writing prompt to further practice writing skills and refine handwriting in preparation for cursive.

History - We are reading through The Story of the World

Reading - Maddie works through Bob Books and beginner readers, Hope reads chapter books to herself and sometimes aloud to mom and occasionally prepares a book report, Mom reads to the girls everyday. Last year, Hope also used some reading comprehension workbooks.

Memory work - through Classical Conversations and the accompanying resources, both Maddie and Hope will memorize 600 facts spanning subjects of math, science, history, geography, Latin grammar, and English grammar as well as a history timeline.  Believe it or not, this is actually one of their favorite things - this will be Hope's 3rd year and Maddie's 1st, though Maddie has enjoyed memorizing with Hope in the past years. 

Additional learning - our family will participate in a variety of learning experiences or "field trips" including visiting the library, historical sites, farms, and museums, taking nature walks/hikes, cooking, exercise, culture and tradition and whatever else catches our fancy or incites further interest.  I try to work in crafts/art here and there and encourage their creativity.  They are also afforded plenty of time for play.  

vacation pics

 

We took a week in Virginia Beach back in June, but I didn't manage to get any pics up earlier b/c they have all been on Matt's phone. We had a great time though.  This was the first year that the girls finally decided they LOVE the beach.  We couldn't keep them out of the water and sand.  VA beach is a great place for a family vacation, we're grateful to have family that lives there so we can visit year round.

         
   
 
 
 
 
 
 

Homeschooling for the curious - where to begin before you begin

When people start thinking about homeschooling, they start asking about things like curriculum.  But there are definitely a few things I recommend people think through and do long before they get to curriculum and homeschool groups, etc...  

1. The Why before the How  

              This is more important than you might think.  There will be difficult days - it won't matter how you do things or what you do, it will fall apart (at least on those days) if you don't have a solid WHY. And, over the long haul you'll get worn down and worn out and doubtful unless you have a "why" - your goal, mission, whatever you want to call it - to keep you focused.

              This looks really different for everyone.  I suggest (for homeschoolers and non-home educators alike) that you actually take time to sit down and write out the values and goals that are most important in raising and educating your children.  Decide what you want the outcome to be in say, 18 years. Then, spend some time considering what is the best way to get there from here.  Is it a home education? Is it public school? Is it something else?  Then, you can begin to plan the "how" accordingly. Also, speaking as a Christian to other believers, I would say - ask God what He wants you to do.  Many parents make lots of plans, but never stop to honestly and humbly really ask the question of God.  

2.  First Steps on the "How" Path

              Don't run to your computer and start googling curriculum or "homeschool" - you'll invite chaos and confusion in heaping amounts.  With the growing popularity of home education, there is a plethora of resources, advice, communities, etc... and they are not all for you.  Don't spend hours hopping down rabbit trails that lead you in a million different directions.

              Do a little research on methodology or approach.  You will find these key words and maybe one or two more: Traditional, Charlotte Mason, Classical, Unit Study, Unschooling, Independent Study, Eclectic, Umbrella Program. I recommend the book "100 Top Picks for Homeschool Curriculum" by Cathy Duffy for a concise overview and some helpful charts/resources - browse through it at a bookstore if you can or purchase it if you like.  Decide which of these approaches best suits you and your family and which approach is best aligned with your "why" goals.  Then you can begin to look into specific curriculum and resources that fit your approach(es) and you can avoid being sucked in a million other distracting directions.  

3.  Look Challenge in the Face

              If you come to this step, then you are probably pretty seriously considering homeschooling as a real option.  Only now, the practical difficulties will be staring you down.  Time for strategy.  My first strategy is prayer and lots of it.  But beyond that, you will need to address a few things - though, you don't need to have them all perfectly worked out - just keep them in mind.  Areas where concern might start bubbling up include: making a financial plan, addressing insecurities about whether you can "handle this", "be the teacher", and all other relational matters with your own children, what dad's role and involvement are to be, organization in the home, etc...  Again - taking a look at your "WHY" will keep you moving down the path while you wrestle through logistics.  In addition, don't be too hard on yourself. Nobody ever feels like they are fully equipped for this by themselves - most of us start out feeling totally unequipped as a matter of fact.  It is helpful if you can find another family or two that have been doing this successfully for a little while and you like what you are seeing - maybe someone who is still in the first few years and someone who is graduating kids.  Pick their brains.  Joining a group can be very helpful and supportive too - just remember, people are going to be doing things differently and not everyone will have it right for you.  

 ....so there is a jumping off point for you.  Feel free to leave any questions or comments and I'll be writing another post soon.  
 

Homeschooling for the curious

I've had a lot of questions recently regarding our homeschooling adventures from parents who are maybe interested and even people who are just curious because it seems crazy or different to them.  So, I thought I'd do a couple of posts.  I welcome any questions and comments as I go along.  Here are the kinds of things you can take a peek at in the next few posts:

- Where to begin before you begin

- What curriculum we use

- What our daily schedule looks like

- What challenges us the most

Family Night! - Back to School

School is back in session at our house.  One of the perks of homeschooling is setting your own schedule. This year, that means working through August so that we can take November and December entirely off and enjoy the holidays and the arrival of (and all the changes that come with) our new baby boy.  

We're off to a great start and I thought it would be fun to celebrate and cheer the girls on with a Back-to-School themed family night.  We went pretty simple, but had a ton of fun.

I've only managed to snag a few pics, as the rest are still on Matt's iphone - but here is what we did:

- dinner in the school room

        Sometimes a change of setting for the family meal is an exciting treat.  I packed dinner in each of our lunch boxes and we ate around the table in the school room.  The menu was juice boxes, apple, chips, and lean pockets.  

- yearbooks

         I pulled out one of my own and one of Matt's yearbooks from way back in the middle school years and also our college yearbooks.  The girls had fun seeing how silly we looked when we were young and even picking out people we went to school with whom they know - including Uncle Heath (who met Matt in middle school) and our close friends from college.  

- games

          I collected a bunch of school supplies and put them in Hope's backpack.  We each took turns blindly pulling something out and trying to guess what it was.  Then, we hit the giant chalkboard wall in the school room for some doodling and tic-tac-toe

- dessert

          I browsed the internet for some school-themed cupcakes and came up with these.  My own special twist was to make the apples out of starburst candies (the leaves are a random flat sour candy I found). The "chalkboards" are chocolate covered grahams and the "chalk" is Good n' Plenty.  

   
 
 
 

motherhood and depression

A couple of women have started a support group here in Reston - I think it is a great idea! I'm posting the information in case you or someone you know might benefit from this.  I've been very lucky to not have experienced any depression with the births of my children so far, but have known plenty of women who have and I'm grateful that there is a now resource in our town.  

Is motherhood or pregnancy not what you expected?  If you are struggling with feelings of anxiety, irritabilility, or sadness, you are not alone.  Depression is the most common complication of pregnancy and childbirth.  
 
The Reston Mothers Support Group is open to anyone feeling overwhelmed by motherhood or pregnancy.  Come meet and talk with other moms who understand your experience and know that things can get better.
 
Meetings are held on the 2nd and 4th Thursday of every month at 10 a.m. in the conference room of the Reston YMCA at 12196 Sunset Hills Rd., Reston.  Meetings are free, babies are welcome, and thanks to the YMCA, childcare is available for older babies and toddlers during the meeting.  
 
For more information, contact one of the group co-leaders, Jessica Monte (703-863-3601) or Rebecca Castagna ([email protected]), or visit Postpartum Support Virginia at http://postpartumva.org/.  

Letting go a little at a time

Hope and Maddie have been spending the week with their grandparents.  I'm so happy for them - I think that having relationships with your grandparents is special.  I kind of missed out on that, and I'm thrilled that they won't have to.

But, I'm missing them.  I'm walking around thinking to myself that it feels kind of lonely around here - at least, very quiet.  And I'm thinking, am I going to be one of those empty nesters that sends their kids tearfully off to college and then doesn't know what to do with themselves?  I'm not, well yes to the tearful part, but not the other part.  That doesn't stop the question from running through my head though.

As a homeschooling mom, I have the privilege of spending a lot of time with my kids.  Not all of it is easy, but I really do relish it.  I love knowing them.  And, they are a very big part of my life right now.  I wouldn't say I'm dependent on them though or have some unhealthy reliance on them for my own personal satisfaction or happiness.  I just really like those kiddos.  

We raise our children to leave us.  I once heard a person say that, or I read it, or something like that. But it is true.  My intention has never been to hold on forever - I want my kids to go and chase their dreams and have their own families and fulfill whatever it is that God has planned for them.  

Sometimes letting go is not easy.  I think maybe it is a control thing.  Right now, I'm not in control of my children.  I can't be sure they are eating healthily or practicing good safety.  I can't be an extra set of eyes and ears and hands for them.  That is really uncomfortable. Not for them, but for my own vulnerable heart.

But, I have left them in the care of people whom I trust.  I know that my parents love my children and are able and willing to take extra good care of them.  

This is a small step of practice for the days ahead when my children will be grown and will leave my home to make their own.  Those days will be tearful, I'm sure, but happy tears.  I'll be releasing my kids totally to the care of the most trustworthy, most able, most loving One - the same God who has been trustworthy with my own life and even now watches, protects, and prepares my children in His grace.

I'm grateful that because of Him, I do not fear.  But, I'm also grateful for the chance to practice letting go a little here and there along the way - I like to think of the cutting of the apron strings less as a painful severance of a too-tight knot and more as a slow, gentle, peaceful loosening.  

2 interesting facts about Ami

I wrote a post a long while ago about how "Mr. Brown Can Moo, Can You?" (the little board book version) was the favorite of both Hope and Maddie.  Turns out, it is Ami's favorite too.  We have a gazillion books (we can never have enough) and you can hide that one anywhere and she'll pull it out.  It is the one she brings to me over and over again.  I find it interesting that all three of my kids were really attached to this particular book at different times.  I've had it memorized for years as a result.

Secondly, Ami is apparently very, VERY sensitive to mosquito bites.  She got a few over a week ago and they swelled up to massive proportions.  I'm very sensitive too, so I didn't worry about it too much at the time, but she looked terrible with these big red welts.  Since then, we've noticed a pattern.  She'll get a bite one day (we're seriously trying to protect her, but those nasty buggers keep finding a way!) and you'll hardly notice it.  By the next day it will swell up huge and turn red, then eventually she'll break out with a few hives or bumps just around the bite area.  Poor kid. She doesn't seem to scratch at them too much, but they just look terrible and irritating.  I guess we'll have to be extra vigilant with her and maybe invest in some hydrocortizone cream or benadryl just in case. 

moving into the big girl bed

Ami is on her way to moving into her big girl bed.  We decided to go ahead and move her out of the crib so that the new baby can use it when it is time.  Hope and Maddie have shared a room for a few years now and Ami will make 3.  The girls love sharing a room and basically it is just a "bunk room" for sleeping and maybe reading or having a private moment during the day.  The bedroom next door is the play room with all of the toys.  Ami is currently in a small nursery room which will become the baby boy's room.  

I always hear a lot of questions about when to move the baby out of the crib, whether to use a toddler bed, etc...  There are a lot of ways to go about that, so I'm not saying our way is the right way.  I just thought I'd share with you what we have done in case you are wondering how we made it work.

Maddie was born the day before Hope's 2nd birthday.  Hope had already been sleeping in a twin bed for a couple of months by then with no problem.  We decided to forgo the in-between toddler bed b/c we already had a twin bed and it didn't make much sense to purchase a new toddler bed and mattress.  We had moved into this house in the spring.  At that time, we set up Hope's nursery where she was sleeping in the crib. But, in expectation of the new baby, we also set up her "big girl" room with the twin bed. She basically had two rooms and enjoyed sitting on and playing on the twin bed.  I began to have her nap in the twin bed while she still slept at night in the crib.  She already had an affection for the twin bed and was a good sleeper, so she took to this easily.  Then one night, I simply asked her "do you want to sleep in your crib or the big girl bed?" and she picked the twin bed.  She slept there for naps and night time ever since.  She was only 1 1/2 or so at the time, so if you are wondering whether it is possible to make this transition early - the answer is yes, it is possible.  (BTW - our twin, which could be converted into a loft, had wooden guard rails all the way around, so that was helpful too).

Maddie was a little older when we moved her because we wondered how different sleep patterns would come into play with the sisters sharing a room.  I honestly can't remember all the details of how we did it with her - but we did move her directly into a twin bed (we lofted Hope's and slid Maddie's underneath like bunks).  We used one of those sleep guard rails you can buy at Target or wherever.  She was probably about 2 at the time and the girls are very close, prefer to share a room, and really miss each other if one isn't there.

So now we have Ami - who is not quite 1 1/2 yrs. yet.  But, with the new baby coming in the fall, we've started to make some arrangements around the house.  This included buying bunk beds.  Now Hope sleeps on her loft (with space underneath for bookshelves and a little seat, etc...) and Maddie sleeps on the top bunk on the wall across from her.  The bottom bunk is to be Ami's.  Since it is all set up, I figured we'd go ahead and start working with Ami.  Hope and Maddie are away at their grandparent's house this week, and I figured it was a good non-stressful time to start to work this out.  So, I had Ami take her afternoon nap in there today.  It did take her a few minutes to settle down - but being as how she was tired and had her blankie and is a good sleeper and easy to put down for naps in general - she eventually fell asleep and did very well.  So she will continue to nap in there this week and eventually down the road here before too long, we'll give it a shot a night.  So, again, it is possible to do this early if you need or want to.

Although, you may not want to.  I know some parents find it more convenient to have a child stay in a crib longer where they are contained when they wake up (though some kids learn to get out anyway).  I used to put a little pressure gate in the doorway of Hope's room at first because I didn't want her wandering (falling) down stairs in the morning or the middle of the night.  One of my fondest memories is of her standing at the gate each morning calling in her little voice "mama! I wake up! mama! I wake up!" Also, once you have a good sleep routine on your hands, I understand why parents are really hesitant to do anything that might change that. 

I have to say that we have moved very early on this on all three accounts.  But I think that we are proof in a way that you don't have to follow some prescribed pattern of when and how and to what size bed. Just take care that the kids are safe and do what works for them and you. 

sunflower cookies

These are so cute.  I think one cookie would send anyone into sugar overload - but I'm definitely going to do this as a special reward with the girls one day after school this fall.  Check out the how-to and complete article here at makeandtakes.com 

  

New hairstyle

I'll get back to blogging some things again here soon.  In the meantime, look what I discovered - BANGS! I didn't cut them in, it is actually just hair growing in again from losing a ton after Ami's birth.  I haven't had bangs since...well, since I was like 3.  Weird that I seem to have lost a ton of hair right up front at my forehead.  In the meantime, I guess I have a new option with how I wear my hair - though I can't say I approve of my hair changing styles without my permission! I can't wait to see what my hair is doing after this next baby is born - it is going to be CRAZY.  Strange layers anyone? 

 Sorry for the terrible quality of this picture - but you get the idea.

 

(un)predictable birth

More often than not, something doesn't go according to plan.  I think moms tend to forget that - but it is something we all should remember and remember to tell first-time moms.  It seems like these days there is a lot of talk and emphasis about birth plans and birth stories.  You don't have a birth story until the birth happens.  And frequently, the plan and the story just don't match up.  Apparently this ends up being a big disappointment to many moms.  I think it is probably good to go in having thought through things, made some decisions ahead of time, and with hope and expectation for the best experience you can imagine. But, I also think it is necessary to go into the birth experience with expectation that something won't go the way you thought it would. 

I have known several moms who have desired a home birth or natural birth, only to have unforeseen things require them to move to a hospital and make use of the medication and technology available there.  On the other hand, I have a friend who, just this week, having planned to birth her son at the hospital within walking distance of her house, had no time and delivered the baby with her husband in their bathroom. Kind of ironic, isn't it? 

Things didn't go the way I had planned at first either.  But thereafter, I've had a weird privilege of predictability.  I'm not saying this as any kind of endorsement for c-section if you don't have to go that route, but it is kind of nice to already have my son's birthday picked out.  I knew ahead of time the day that my second and third daughter would be born.  I knew who would be at my house to help, what time the child would be born and how long I would likely stay in the hospital.  Unfortunately, I also knew what the recovery ahead would be like.  Gratefully, things went according to plan.  The c-sections were all successful with zero complications during or after the surgery, all of my babies were healthy - Maddie and Ami were even the exact same weight at birth! With 3 kids, I have relatively little experience with unpredictability in birth.  But, when it comes to this next c-section, that is exactly what I am hoping for - no surprises.  

It is a little bit weird to not have to anticipate the surprise timing of labor starting.  I'll never know what it feels like to push a baby out or to go home the next day.  But, I'll never say that I'm disappointed with my birth stories.  My stories are this: Three times I have given birth to a healthy child, bonded with them, recovered from c-section, and gone on to raise healthy children.  I count that as success.  And even more, I count it as God's grace and blessing.  

Just a reminder to wash your grocery bags

 Ugh - I still can never remember to bring my re-useable grocery totes to the store with me.  At least I'm an avid recycler of the the plastic grocery bags we end up using.  But for those of you who are on the ball - here is friendly reminder to toss those bags in the wash once in a while.  Turns out, according to a recent study, that bags which are re-used for groceries can harbor harmful bacteria such as E.coli - especially if you are storing them in your car during intensely hot summer days.  To help avoid illness, also remember to keep meats bagged in their own plastic baggie from the store and don't use your grocery totes for other purposes also such as going to the gym or beach. 
 

growth spurt

I think Hope is in a growth spurt right now.  You can never really tell, but lately she has been making extra complaints about being "soooo tired."  On top of that, on Saturday - at a cookout with friends - she ate 3 hamburgers (no buns), corn on the cob, grilled peaches, and dessert.  Then on the next day, at another cookout for the 4th, she ate an entire plate of food followed by 2 or 3 hamburgers, more fruit, more chips, and dessert.  I was amazed at the amount of food she put away this weekend.  

give them some nutrients with their ice cream

 A summer favorite around here is ice cream.  But, I also don't always want my children to have so much sugar and fat.  So here is a little trick that works well when you want a special cold sweet treat and just nothing will do but ice cream - but you are trying not to fill up on just junk food. 

We make ice cream cones at home to save some change.  Our girls also really like fresh summer fruits.  So one day, they requested a strawberry on top of an ice cream cone and I got this idea.  I cut up a bunch of strawberries and filled the inside of the cone.  Then I rolled one small scoop of ice cream and topped off the cone.  Of course, I added their strawberry on top.  I made one for myself too and it was super yummy. Just enough ice cream to curb the craving and a dose of nutrient packed fruit too.  Some of the ice cream melted slightly into the cone coating the fruit in tasty creaminess and we all ate the whole thing without making much of a mess.

I think this would be tasty with fresh peaches or bananas as well - or whatever favorite fruit you like.  

It's a boy!

Just thought that if you hadn't heard yet, you'd like to know that #4 is a boy! and...if you had heard, then you might be asking along with everyone else "Aren't you so excited?"

I keep getting that question.  It's very understandable since we have had 3 girls.  It seems like many of our friends and family are even more excited that we are having a boy than we are.  The truth is that we really, really didn't care either way.  We weren't trying for a boy or necessarily even hoping for one.  We're just excited to be having another baby.  So, when people ask us "aren't you SO excited?" - the answer is a definite yes!  But it is exactly the same excited as if we had found out we were having a girl.  

Still, now that we know it is a boy and my brain is starting to track down that path, I think I am growing more excited every day about having a son.  It will definitely be different and new to us.  I really can't wait to see what he will look like.  Having some blue and other colors mixed in with all the pink around here will be a nice change too.  Matt will finally get to play with some tools and trucks along with all the baby dolls and dress up, which I am sure he is looking forward to.  

It's good.  We are in fact, SO excited!

comments on #4 from others

I don't see too many people around here with 4 kids or even three for that matter.  Four kids doesn't seem like that many to me - but certainly not every family would choose the same.   Nevertheless, I've already started to receive interesting comments about having a fourth.  Nothing really offensive - but commentary all the same.  

I was at a social event recently with my children and a lot of people I didn't know.  One woman said as she passed by, "you're brave," and then continued to kind of watch me throughout the rest of the time.  I didn't mind so much, but it is kind of strange to feel observed.  Another woman, upon realizing the new baby would be number four, simply chose to say, "wow."  And I also received the comment "...and you look so calm!" 

It makes me chuckle a bit.  The truth is that each of these kids is a huge blessing to our family and we love and are grateful for them all.  Life is busy, but if I'm overwhelmed by anything it is the grace of God who blesses us so richly and makes our family work and work well.  

I know that living in an area where the cost of living is so high, some people are simply wondering how we do it.  Well - we do it just like families did a long time ago.  My mom's best friend grew up in a house with 11 people and one bathroom.  So, can we fit four children in our townhouse? Yes, easily.  We share a lot, make reasonable decisions, and maintain grateful attitudes.  The kids have a great perspective on family and sharing life that goes beyond selfishness - in other words, we all - no matter how small - work together.  

I love our family.  We are all very excited about the new baby - even the kids can't wait to meet their new sibling.  

So, when I get interesting comments from other people - my mind and heart retort with "yes, sometimes even I can hardly believe how blessed I am!"

what is your go-to snack?

  I realized I eat a lot of peanut butter.  Some natural PB on whole wheat bread or toast is my go-to snack. It is one thing that I could easily eat during my first trimester and is extremely quick and easy.  It's great when I need something to tide me over and it can make a banana, apple or stalk of celery feel like a meal. It is a bit high in fat and calories and if you don't stick to the natural kind, it can also be way high in sugar. I like other nut butters as well, but they are just not the same.  As I was eating some gooey goodness on warm toast this morning, it occurred to me what a staple snack in my diet peanut butter often is, and I wondered what is your go-to snack?  

our town

We just got back from a nice vacation.  Visiting other locations always sends my brain into comparison for where we currently live, in Reston.  Over the past nearly five years, I've come to really love some things about this place, though I never thought this is where we would live.  Like anywhere else, it also has a few down points.  So, here are some thoughts so you can get to know my town.  If you are from here, feel free to add anything I've missed in the comments sections!

AWESOME REASONS WHY ANYONE WITH YOUNG KIDS SHOULD LIVE HERE  

- miles of interconnected walking/biking trails

- 15 outdoor swimming pools

- excess of various playgrounds and parks

- family friendly town centers that include awesome dining/shopping/entertainment and uniquely fun features such as fountains designed for kids to play in and outdoor winter ice skating rink

- live entertainment just for kids in the town centers nearly every day of the summer

- community centers with kid/youth programs

- some of the best public schools in the nation

- access to fabulous grocery stores such as Whole Foods, Wegmans, and Trader Joes 

- several very nice local and organic food farmers markets 

- access to Washington D.C. including all the museums, history, National Zoo, pro sports teams, etc...

- Reston has it's own zoo and waterpark

- aesthetically pleasing town still retains quick, convenient access to all needs

- a lot of other young families with children 

- not far at all from a ton of great places to visit

REASONS WHY YOU MIGHT NOT WANT TO LIVE IN RESTON

- high cost of living

- Northern Virginia traffic

- Reston is not technically a city but rather a giant homeowners association

- Reston began as a planned community in the early 1970's - therefore, it isn't really very old and there is an obvious lack of depth of history exhibited through architecture or long standing landmarks.

- politically charged, materialistic area

(just an interesting side historical side note about Reston - if you've ever read the book "The Hot Zone" about a new strain of ebola virus, it is based on a true story that took place here.) 

they baked a cake ALL BY THEMSELVES!

It's true.  Something I planned for the summer was to let the kids get in the kitchen ON THEIR OWN a bit more.  (You know I'm gunning for days of breakfast in bed :) But really, I hope that they will enjoy learning some skills and having the ability to bake for themselves, friends and family and give home baked gifts as they desire.  

So, I set them up for their first solo experience with a recipe for Dump Cake (so named because you basically just dump the ingredients in, it's actually a bit more like a cobbler).  There are four ingredients and it is simple enough to put together that I figured their attention span wouldn't fail before they were finished.  I did have to help Hope with the can opener and then I just left the two of them alone in the kitchen.  ALONE until they told me it was ready to go in the oven.  Thus, I have no pictures of them working - since I wasn't there. ( I admit, at moments it was difficult for me to restrain myself from poking my head in there just to make sure things were going well and my kitchen wasn't being destroyed).

I wrote out the recipe beforehand, indicating who would get to do which parts.  Hope read the recipe aloud step by step and helped Maddie along.  

They did a great job.  They even put the cake mix box into the recycling outside without being asked. They really do make a great team.  

I baked it for them, since they are of course not old enough to use the oven by themselves.  It turned out just as it should.  Unfortunately, I don't have pictures of the finished product either (mom fail.)  But it was super fun to leave them alone in there and see how proud they were to accomplish this by themselves.  

It was just the right recipe for this too - not too messy, very uncomplicated, very few steps.  If you are interested, you can see the recipe here.  You can also really vary this to your taste by substituting peaches or blueberries for the cherries, or just using cherries and a chocolate cake mix, or I know a lot of people add chopped nuts to the top.  In any case, whether you help the kiddos out or let them go it alone - it's an easy, fun recipe that kids will enjoy making (and eating).

National Zoo

I never would have thought we'd end up living in Northern Virginia.  But, I do love living close to D.C. since it offers so many great things to do.  We make a trip to the National Zoo at least once a summer.  Monday could not have been MORE PERFECT!  The weather was slightly cool and not humid at all.  The animals were out and we had a great time. 

             
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

sprinkler fun

Unfortunately, our neighborhood's pool is only opened on weekends until the end of June when the rest of the kiddos get out of school.  So, I pulled out the sprinkler for the girls and they had a good time.  Ami was napping - I think it will be fun to include her next time.

   
 
 
 

I'm grilling in the rain, just grilling in the rain...

The other night, I sent Matt out in the rain to grill our dinner.  The girls decided to put on their raincoats and join him outside so I made them all pose for a picture.  So glad the girls aren't afraid of a little rain.

 

surprise! they actually do know what to do

While I was in our downstairs bathroom today, I noticed something.  The roll of toilet paper was on the roll backwards (under) as opposed to how I do it.  I'm a detail person and would never put it on that way myself, so it caught my attention.  I also remembered that yesterday, my 4 yr old called to me from that bathroom to say that she needed more toilet paper - to which I replied that there was another new roll in the room with her.  

I'm pretty sure that she replaced the roll herself.

That may not sound like much, but for a mom sometimes little things like this are HUGE.   

It means a couple of things:

- my four year old pays attention and can actually do things for herself and the family

- my four year old might be willing to do something responsible even when no one is looking

- I can now ask and expect my child to replace the roll if she uses the last of the previous roll and hold      her accountable for it

That is a lot to derive from this, you may think.  But every little indication of feeling of responsibility followed by a wee accomplishment are a big success for growing children and their parents.    

Especially since this is just a chore I tended to do mindlessly myself as needed and had not particularly applied any lessons to my children regarding.  Do you see?  She observed something and took the appropriate action completely upon herself.

Seems like a long post on something trivial, but if you are a parent then I think you know what I'm getting at.  So what wee accomplishment did your child do that amazed you recently?

what do you people eat?

My last post got me thinking about food again.  I'm always curious about what other families are eating at their homes.  Partly, because I crave variety.  I'm forever changing up our menu.  And also, because I'm curious about how other moms are pulling off this whole dinner thing.  I try really hard to keep things fairly simple for my sake and my family's and to serve a variety of tasty and nutritious foods.  Actually, I have to admit, I'm pretty picky in some ways about the kind of food that gets served here (but I don't think I'm crazy picky) and of course, I'm bound to a budget.  I figure I'm not too far off from most moms out there and so I wonder what is working for all of you.  A few summers ago, I posted what we ate for dinner each week.  I don't know if anyone cares, but since I love to see your menus, I thought you might be curious about mine too.  Also, it just kind of helps me keep tabs on our nutrition, etc...   So, I thought maybe I'd do that again.  I posted my menu for this week below and looking at it helps me gauge that we need a few more green veggies in our menu for next week since despite the fact that there is cilantro and parsley in our menu this week there isn't much else. See, it helps me.  What I want to know though, is what are you people eating these days?

Monday - I sent Matt to the store and we ate grilled Cheddarwurst, corn on the cob, grilled peaches, and tortilla chips with homemade guacamole

Tuesday - small group "grill night" grilled bratwurst, chicken, and turkey dogs on whole wheat buns, grilled marinated portabello mushrooms and asparagus, grilled peaches

Wednesday - grilled BBQ chicken whole-wheat pita pizzas with mozzerella, onion, tomato, fresh corn, and cilantro and red grapes on the side

Thursday (that's tonight) we are having turkey burgers and cold wild rice salad with celery, parsley, grapes and almonds

Friday - homemade fresh corn chowder

I haven't got the weekend worked out yet.  

good sites for big and little appetites

There are a couple of websites that I have visited recently for some new menu ideas for our families.  I thought maybe someone else would find them helpful too so here they are:

weelicious - I thought this site was great and garnered several ideas

tastebudding - also a great site, and if you can submit recipes here too since they are all submitted by moms like you.

summer beverages made just right

I love sweet tea.   I also like a frosty glass of lemonade in the summer.   Mostly I drink ice water and try to  avoid the sugary beverages, but sometimes I just crave those good ol' summer classics.

The thing is, some people like it sweeter than others.  And I want to be able to control my sugar intake.  

There is a great trick to this and to making your beverage just right for you and for each person you are serving.

Simple syrup.

The thing is, if you try to sweeten tea after it is made by adding granulated sugar it just isn't the same.  And often as not you get undissolved grains in the bottom of the glass. I don't use artificial sweeteners which might dissolve more readily, so what to do?

Simple syrup is a saturated solution made by dissolving as much sugar as possible into boiling hot water. If you made rock candy in science as a kid, this is where you started.  Use about 1 C sugar per 1 C water. You can make a small jug of it and keep it in the refrigerator.  

If you make a jug of unsweetened iced tea, all you need to do is add a little simple syrup to your glass until it is as sweet as you like - a little goes a long way.  But, you can also use this as a base for making lemonade - just add water and fresh squeezed lemons - or limeade or any other fresh fruit drink.  A favorite of mine is homemade fresh ginger ale - already listed on this site under recipes.  

Okay, so sugar isn't good for you.  But if you are going to drink it, do it right.  Enjoy a perfectly sweetened icy glass!